Two of Three

Here is the scenario:

You are searching for your ideal partner in life- your husband, wife, muse, whoever you want. Out of the following three qualities, two of them are wondrously exhibited in your ideal partner, but the third is very lacking. Which two out of the three would you choose to be present, and which one would be almost completely absent? Here are the three:


The second and third might also be appropriately termed 'physical beauty' and 'inner beauty', respectively.

What would your choice be?

I'm not saying that your ideal person would have to be either brain dead, physically deformed, or downright evil, but they would either have to be below average mentally, quite unattractive or very self-centered.

I think that's more than I need to say about the scenario. I often find such unrealistic imaginings to be annoying and not worth a person's time, but here the topic is light enough and I think a person's answer can reveal important things about their thought. Here is my own:

I think I might be surprising myself a little with this answer, but after thinking this idea through I think that I would choose kindness and attractiveness to be exemplified in my "ideal" wife and intelligence to be lacking. Now don't get me wrong at all here; I'm not the kind of guy who would want to control my wife in any way, so it's not like I want her to be stupid so she won't stand up to me. Also, please understand that in pretty much any relationship I would value intelligence much more highly than physical beauty. It's just that I think in finding a person you'll love (or try to love) for the rest of your life there needs to be at least some physical attraction, something about your partner that can stimulate you in a very irrational way. I really don't want to seem shallow about this, but if someone is revoltingly ugly it's hard for anyone to move through that and look at their other admirable qualities.

As for the other options, it would be impossible for me to love someone completely lacking in kindness. And by choosing kindness in this scenario, that would make the trait exceptional in this imaginary partner of mine, and I think that kind of inner beauty is really what would make me fall in love with someone. That is, once I get by all those outer barriers of appearance and my "minimum" of physical attractiveness, so to speak, that if absent would stop me from interacting further with someone from the get-go.

All in all, I really want to find someone who is kind and intelligent and attractive in that shallow way to which males are so susceptible. I value intelligence and inner beauty much much more than appearance, but as I said, when you think about being with someone for life, you should be attracted to them at least a little bit in every possible way.